Posts by Victoria Albina
Ep #108: Wanting a Goal vs. Wanting a Feeling
We are well into the month of March, and if you’ve found that the goals you set as your New Year’s resolutions have fallen by the wayside, you are not alone. When we’re living with codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits, too often we’re not truly focused on our own internal motivations with goal setting, and…
Read MoreThought Work 101: A How-To Guide
The Thought Work Protocol is a framework I use in my coaching practice. It’s based in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, a top-down approach to understanding how humans operate in the world. With my clients I pair this top-down, brain-to-body framework with a somatic, body-based approach. Our nervous system runs the show too, our habitual experience of life…
Read MoreEp #107: Thought Work 101
I’ve recently been getting a spike in messages from all of you asking for directions on where to go to learn all about the thought work protocol I talk about so often here on the podcast. It’s a topic that is weaved into every aspect of my work but to give you a go-to episode…
Read MoreEp #106: Self-Sacrifice
Do you ever find yourself slipping into a martyr role? Is self-sacrifice a way of living for you, or do you maybe see this behavior in someone you love? This was my experience for such a long time, where being a fixer for everyone was a way for me to feel great and avoid looking…
Read MoreEp #105: Buffering vs. Conscious Distraction
As humans who sometimes struggle to manage our emotions and voice them, and especially so for folks dealing with trauma, it’s no surprise that we use buffering as a way to make those uncomfortable feelings go away. However, we all know that buffering is never a long-term solution for managing our emotions, so is there…
Read MoreEp #104: Pressured Perfectionist Procrastination
Do you habitually put off tasks by telling yourself that you “work best under pressure”? Does it feel vitally important that every task you set out to do is perfect or worth creating tons of pressure around? If you find yourself nodding along, resonating with this narrative, pressurized perfectionist procrastination may be an underlying root…
Read MoreEp #103: Meditation Doesn’t Work for Everyone
Mindfulness is a big component of what I talk about here on the podcast and in my work with clients because bringing that level of awareness is vital to our healing. And so, you might imagine that I’m a huge proponent of meditation – and I am – but today, we’re talking about why it’s…
Read MoreEp #102: What if It’s Not a Problem?
Does life feel like a collection of problems right now? The habit of being problem-focused is something I used to do myself for so long, and it’s something I see in my clients pretty much every single day. But when you’re out in the world labeling the circumstances in your life as problems, how does…
Read MoreWhat if It’s Not a Problem?
When your sense of worth is externalized, which is the core wounding of codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing tendencies, we tend to source our own wellness, worth, and value from others. And especially if you grew up in chaos or see yourself as a fixer, that person who takes on other people’s issues as things you…
Read MoreManaging Other People’s Emotions
Do you believe that it’s your job to manage other people’s moods, feelings, and emotions for them? With your family, or friends, your partner, at work, even on the subway some days. Do any of these sound familiar: Your partner is annoyed so you try to make them laugh or distract them. Your mom is…
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