The Bea Victoria Albina Blog

There’s a difficult, and frankly, kind of annoying realization that comes with doing deep emotional work: Not all of our suffering is inherent, necessary, or automatic. Some pain comes with…

You have done the therapy. Read the books. Learned about your nervous system. Maybe you can finally see your people-pleasing, perfectionist, and codependent patterns for what they are. And now…

You say yes when you mean no. You explain your decisions like you’re defending a dissertation. You monitor the room to make sure everyone is okay. You anticipate what people…

If you have ever tried to build a routine, stuck with it for approximately four days, and then wondered why you cannot simply make yourself do the same things in…

You want to stop people pleasing, over-functioning, and abandoning yourself to keep everyone else happy. But you also don’t want to become someone who stops caring about the people you…

If you’ve always been “the helper,” this episode may feel deeply familiar. Maybe you’re a nurse, therapist, teacher, coach, social worker, physician, or caregiver. Maybe people have always described you…

Most of us don’t actually fear failure. We fear what we’ll say to ourselves after we fail. We fear the shame. The self-criticism. The spiral of overthinking. The story that…

The longest conversation you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. It’s happening all day, every day. When you make a mistake. When you’re trying something new. When…

Have you ever told yourself you’ll finally start when you feel ready? When you’re more confident. When you’ve done more research. When you’ve figured out the “right” way. If so,…

If you’re a people pleaser, you’ve probably spent years believing your wants don’t matter. Maybe you’ve convinced yourself you don’t really care where you eat, what movie you watch, or…