Blog
Wanting a Goal vs. Wanting a Feeling
The kind of thinking, “I’ll be happy when,” can be so problematic because of what it does to the now. It takes us out of this present moment, our present feeling. It posits the thought error that you will feel something different when your circumstances change. It’s disempowering and leads to so much suffering now…
Read MoreThought Work 101: A How-To Guide
The Thought Work Protocol is a framework I use in my coaching practice. It’s based in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, a top-down approach to understanding how humans operate in the world. With my clients I pair this top-down, brain-to-body framework with a somatic, body-based approach. Our nervous system runs the show too, our habitual experience of life…
Read MoreWhat if It’s Not a Problem?
When your sense of worth is externalized, which is the core wounding of codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing tendencies, we tend to source our own wellness, worth, and value from others. And especially if you grew up in chaos or see yourself as a fixer, that person who takes on other people’s issues as things you…
Read MoreManaging Other People’s Emotions
Do you believe that it’s your job to manage other people’s moods, feelings, and emotions for them? With your family, or friends, your partner, at work, even on the subway some days. Do any of these sound familiar: Your partner is annoyed so you try to make them laugh or distract them. Your mom is…
Read MoreThe Perfect Time for Your Dreams is Now
Does your brain love to tell you to wait? To not do that thing you dream of until your ducks are all in a tidy row, until the time is right, until the stars are perfectly aligned? Whether you defer your dreams for that most perfect moment, struggling to take action towards your goals, or…
Read MoreThe Power of Yet
Do you have big dreams for your life? Do you imagine a future in which you set healthy boundaries, don’t take on other people’s emotions, do what you want to do, not what you feel obligated to do to keep others happy? Do you dream of quitting your job, starting your own business, going to…
Read MoreBelieving in Your Goals, Believing in Yourself
Here we are, but a few little minutes away from New Year’s, and the potentially crushing weight of that silly tradition of New Year’s resolutions, which let’s be real, just don’t work. Don’t lead to real change in our lives, and particularly for my perfectionist thinkers out there, I see you. The fantasy-level resolutions our…
Read MoreWhy Celebrating Matters: Celebrate Small and Big Wins
How often do you find yourself saying something like, “Well, I mean, not to brag but here’s this amazing thing I did?” How often do you hear someone you love put a disclaimer like that before their own achievement? How often do you pause to recognize and celebrate just how amazing you are, the effort…
Read MoreEmpaths and Other People’s Emotions
Do you identify as an emotional empath? I hear my clients say that they are so often emotionally exhausted by the world because as an empath, they absorb, take on, and feel all the feels and emotions of everyone around them. Like a firehose of emotion that’s constantly turned on within them, flooding them with…
Read MorePleasure: Why You Need It and How to Receive It
We talk a lot here, you and I, about healing. About learning to manage our adult minds, about reparenting our perfect inner children. We use thought work to shift and change our ways of thinking about our lives, to live with intention. And all of that is enormously important. And it is so vital in…
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