Posts by Victoria Albina

For the longest time, I thought I was the only one rolling around in my emotional outsourcing, completely disconnected from my body. The truth is we often disconnect from our bodies as a way to get through life. I’ve since been in community with many humans who have helped themselves reconnect with their bodies, and…

Losing touch with the ability to tune into and trust your bodily signals, especially in the context of emotional outsourcing, is super common. In parts one and two of this mini-series, we’ve defined embodiment and some reasons for cultivating embodiment. And this week, as always, it’s time for the remedies. There’s a complex interplay here…

I’ve been studying and working with the nervous system and somatics for over 20 years, and in that time, embodiment has been a key concept I keep coming back to. While it’s a word that gets thrown around an awful lot, you’re not alone if you don’t know what it means, and that’s why we’re…

Emotional outsourcing develops as a survival skill in response to a felt or experienced lack of belonging, worthiness, and safety, generally during our developmental years. As a little one, you may have developed habits that helped you feel okay in an environment that didn’t give you what you needed, and this explains how your nervous…

How often do you find yourself erupting in defensiveness? Does receiving feedback or critique feel like a personal attack? Is your reactivity negatively impacting your relationships? And how can you course correct when you find yourself being defensive? If you’re ready to stop moving through the world feeling primed for an attack and are tired…

How often do you find yourself mired in stories filled with past regrets? You know, those thoughts that start with, “If I just hadn’t done…”? Thoughts like these cause your brain to run wild with negativity bias and paint a picture of a would-be rosy life that’s just within reach. These thought patterns may feel…

My wife Billey was recently talking about a term in Buddhism that parallels so much of what we tend to do in emotional outsourcing, and that term translates to “idiot compassion.” This specific term feels a bit harsh and judgmental to me, but there are other, similar phrases that carry the same meaning and can…

If you relate to my definition of emotional outsourcing tendencies, the thought of giving yourself true rest likely hasn’t crossed your mind in a hot minute. But have you ever wondered what it would be like to just call it and decide you’re not going to push through when your internal world is screaming for…

In a world where codependence and independence are posited as the only two options for how we can show up in our lives, you’re not alone if you feel a sense of tension in either way of being. White-settler, colonial, and patriarchal narratives tell us that if we don’t look out only for ourselves and…

Something I’ve noticed in the Anchored community, and out in the world in general, is that there’s even more worry going around than usual. I get it. There are a lot of things going on that we could tell worried stories around, and our nervous systems jump to worry because they’re here to protect us.…